Why abuse victims take the blame and don't leave

I've been reading the comments around Gabby Petito's interaction with the police during her Domestic Violence just before she was killed. So many people asked why she blamed herself and why she didn't tell the police she was being abused to help her get out. I believe Gabby suffered from the type of abuse that is so prevalent and yet so hidden and misunderstood, and all of these things are common to this covert abuse. From my experience, I can say that you probably have someone in your circle who's experiencing the same abuse or who has experienced it in the past.

Here, I share my perspective on why women don't reach out, get help, and cover up for their abusers. It's a big topic and could be covered in an entire series, so please keep that in mind. This is a high-level answer to the question. I also have a follow-up video about reactive abuse, something we saw with Gabby that confused the police. I'll release that episode next.

DISCLAIMER: I am not a therapist. I'm sharing from my perspective as a survivor and interviewer. I've lived with depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Please seek professional help if you are concerned for your mental or physical wellness or safety.

If you're in an abusive situation, please reach out to www.thehotline.org or 1-800-THE-HOTLINE

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Category Education